A fear of sexuality

The remarkable Australian social commentator Phillip Adams wrote in a recent issue of ‘The Weekend Australian Magazine’ an article titled “Oh, knock it off.”

I offer pertinent extracts.

“… I’m reminded of an (im)pertinent archaeological discovery in Rome. Or might the term be archaic-theological? The painful fact that the Vatican’s vast collection of Greek and Roman sculptures depicting nuddy blokes had been attacked by a team of Goths or Toths with hammers. The entire marble army denuded of their masculine marbles. Denuded of their dicks. Snipped of their trouser snakes. Pruned of their penises. (Let the record show that one cock escaped the carnage. I found a Roman cherub still in possession of his, the size of a jellybean).” … …

“The vandalism was an inside job carried out by the Vatican itself. A hit squad of nuns had been charged with the choppings-off. After taking circumcision too far, they were required to hide the genital mutilations with crudely plastered fig leaves.” … …

“… a dumpster full of dongers does exist in the dungeons. I wrote to Rome offering to buy the schlongs as a job lot, either to swell my collection of antiquities or to flog at a huge profit as executive paperweights. Or as pets – to compete with the pet rock craze. No reply. Then an emeritus professor from Milan wrote to confirm the papal pile of percys. He’d seen it.”

Despite the Australian colloquialisms, readers should get the drift. Adam continues.

“… most religions (and even Lenin’s Soviet state) proscribed sexual pleasure, dogmas and taboos creating destructive guilt …”